Analyzing news stories: content and comment



Talking about the language and style of news programs in English language on Uzbek television, one can say that most of the scripts are written in Uzbek or Russian, first and then translated in English, that resulted into a kind of calque language — structure of sentences and words used resemble Uzbek (or Russian) newswriting styles.

Hiley Ward explains the difference between print and broadcast journalism and newswriting in both media in his Professional Newswriting. “Newspaper readers review — reread — an article for clarification. Radio listeners and television viewers cannot “re-hear” or “re-see” information. When words and pictures emerge from electronic boxes, they have only one chance to get the message”, the book says.

All the standards and recommendations for better journalism are developed in consideration of audience comprehension and more improved media influence. Our investigations, particularly, survey among fluent-in-English students showed that Euronews does translate hard-to-understand political or administrative terms into people’s language, though the problem it has concerns the usage of numbers too frequently — several statistical facts in one paragraph. The results of the case with Poytakht News showed that there are following aspects that avoid good perception and understanding:

‒ Long sentences

‒ Repetitions & Tautology

‒ Mispronunciation

‒ Hard words to understand

‒ Word order

We would like to analyze a news story from the issue that we presented our surveyed group — Poytakht News from April 14, 2017:

Anchor: The annual national exhibition of banking services, technology and equipment — BANK EXPO 2017 opened its doors on March 12 in Tashkent. Having many years experience, it has become a significant event [and] for the improving the stability of the financial and banking system of Uzbekistan, effective dialogue between the participants of the banking sector of the country.

Comments: 1.Compared to this rewritten version of the speech, this is less comfortable to understand. “BANK EXPO 2017 opened its doors on March 12 in Tashkent. It is an annual national exhibition of banking services, technology and equipment. The story tells you more about this event that, according to specialists, has contributed for the stability of banking system.”

2.“Service” is mispronounced

3.“Improving the stability” is incorrect logically. Stability cannot be improved, but guaranteed/given/provided

4.“and” is extra in the second sentence

5.Too many definite articles given, where unnecessary.

6.Second sentence is too long. Host makes a full stop after the word “Uzbekistan” and continuation of the sentence — “effective dialogue between the participants of the banking sector of the country” remained as an uncompleted sentence.

Content. Voice-over: Bank Expo is the largest regional event in the banking sector. One of the main features of the current exhibition is that it was attended by the record number of organizations: banks, insurance and investment companies, companies engaged in the development of software products for financial institutions. This year’s exhibition presented a wide range of modern banking and finance technology and interactive services, including internet banking, mobile banking as well as other IT products, which are not being implemented in Uzbekistan. During two-days exhibition, commercial banks, credit organizations, large insurance and leasing companies, IT firms of our country presented their latest products and technologies.

The visitors could receive information on achievement and perspectives of the banking sector of Uzbekistan. They provided information on their products to small and family businesses, graduates of educational establishments as well as businesswomen. The event was a good opportunity to get acquainted with a variety of proposals of the existing services market as well as to consult with experts. It should be noted that the second day of the exhibition included an extensive program in the course of which seminars, presentations, meetings and workshops have been held. Additionally, the number of commercial banks awarded certificates for the right to receive a preferential credits for the small and private entrepreneurship. It can be said with confidence that the exhibition provided the participants and guests with a good opportunity to exchange information and experience, got acquainted with the achievements and perspectives of the development of the national banking sector, and expanded mutually beneficial partnership between the representatives of banks and businesses.

Comments: Sentences used are long. Second and third sentences are 34 words long, while the last sentence is exceeding to 50 words, containing several participle clauses. “Banking sector” is repeated for several times, “achievements and perspectives of the national banking sector” is repeated twice. “The visitors could receive information” is an ambiguous phrase, as “could” can refer to different meanings. “The visitors have been able to receive information” would be better choice for television news reporting, though contextual comprehension can help people here to find out the meaning. Last sentence is confusing in terms of subject and predicate correspondence:

It can be said with confidence that the exhibition provided the participants and guests with a good opportunity to exchange information and experience, got acquainted with the achievements and perspectives of the development of the national banking sector, and expanded mutually beneficial partnership between the representatives of banks and businesses.

References:

1. Ward, Hiley. Professional Newswriting. — USA, 1985
2. Kevin, Deirdre; Pellicanò, Francesca; Schneeberger, Agnes. Television News Channels in Europe — European Audiovisual Observatory, 2013